Tuesday, 31 July 2007
three cups of tea? or four. a bit of chocolate and a prayer. Lord, give me the strength to get through this, give me the motivation to get through this, keep me from despair and let me find my rest in You.
the song rides on the waves of the night, unclear but not unheard. a funeral song, the mourners are heavy with the paraphernalia of life and the passersby are ambiguous about how many people are there. a child cries because his mother is crying, that cord is the hardest to break. all that is someone else's story. mine is one of action and life, of the random chaos that scientists tell us explains how the world operates (they tell us in minute detail, down to the most chaotic atom), of the greatness and glory that few aspire to and all attain.
unlike the funeral next door, my story starts in the night.
carter has made me visit dictionary.com more than i ever wanted to- check this out- "the speleological apotheosis of Tiresias" is how she describes Mother. speleological means 'the scientific study of caves', apotheosis means 'elevated to status of god' and Tiresias was the blind prophet who told Oedipus he had married his mama and killed his papa. needless to say, Tiresias wasn't well recieved. hahahah
11:33 pm
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Tuesday, 24 July 2007
some funny lines from Haroun and the Sea of Stories. haroun is travelling by bus and these are the road signs he sees:
'if you try to rush or zoom, you are sure to meet your doom' and 'all the dangerous overtakers, end up at the undertakers' (this actually isnt true, there are still a billion indians alive- i can testify to that). oh i quite like this one- 'if from speed you get your thrill, take precaution- make your will'. haha pretty straightforward eh? oh okay, and this is lame but its the campaign of a politician whose name is buttoo. it says 'who's the one for you? not just one- buttoo!' kay, it is really lame, aaah, oh well, i still love this book =)
11:49 pm
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Monday, 23 July 2007
Kite by U2. I like it... hmmm... life's never easy is it?
Who's to say where the wind will take you
Who's to say what it is will break you
I don't know
Which way the wind will blow
Who's to know when the time has come around
Don't want to see you cry
I know that this is not goodbye
cambridge sits on my mind nowadays, like a fat man in a deep leather couch who cant get up. haha
"these dreams started singing to me out of nowhere..."
1:09 am
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12:57 am
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Thursday, 19 July 2007
In the beginning was a river. The river became a road and the road branched out to the whole world. And because the road was once a river it was always hungry. - okri makes magical realism really worth studying. carter makes it intriguing and gripping and rushdie makes it fun. whooo!
dreams are soo important right now. Lord, thankyou for sending me the right word at the right time to keep me knowing where my focus is and whom to trust right now, when the future seems not just unclear but unwanted.
Only two things stand in your way: dreaming it, then doing it. Have you dared to dream, really dream? If something is within your apparent reach, it isn't a dream. If it doesn't stretch you, cost you, or involve risk, it isn't a dream. Dreams change you even as they change the world around you...Remember the story of Joseph? He dreamed big dreams; God-given dreams. And what was the response of his brothers? They said, ' "Look, this dreamer is coming!...let us...kill him..." ' People who aren't pursuing their own dreams are usually the first to criticise people who are...What's the worst thing that could happen if you pursue your dream and don't achieve it? You could end up where you are now. And what's the best thing that could happen? You could find yourself in new territory, enjoying new blessings, living the life God meant for you to live!
my dreams were weaved in green mango grove paths, in overcrowded eager classrooms of children, in dark stone libraries, in the people i met whose vigour and inspiration for life opened my eyes and partly in my parents own dreams for me. was listening to a family friend whose child is going to start school- the dreams our parents have for us are soo large. the smartest child, the prettiest child, the goodest child. right. haha
life never cushions our dreams but thats what makes them dreams, they arent visible or floating right before our eyes but they're there. they were there some time ago; conceptualised and born before we even realised it. but now is the time to hold on, to finish this last leg of school with those precious dreams held tight, to strive like that sentence through the blizzard and to smile at the end knowing we had something worth working for, we have something worth living for.
sweet hopes and dreams, the promises of God- "Christ in you, hope of glory"
12:34 am
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Saturday, 14 July 2007
Thankyou Lord for this opportunity, this experience, these people, this time, this journey- everything that TJ Drama has been to me has enriched me, taught me, embraced me and given me joy.
10:08 pm
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Tuesday, 10 July 2007
I went into the woods because I wanted to live deliberately. I wanted to live deep and suck out all the marrow of life... to put to rout all that was not life; and not, when I came to die, discover that I had not lived.
First posts should have something interesting, something alluring... but this is going to be boring. I can feel it in the fingers that type (i.e. my own fingers) haha
Two sundays ago this song played in my head and two or three days ago it played again after a terrible dream. Was both morbid and scary. Oh well, its just a dream. Ah yes, the song...
Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life
Trusting you, Lord is the most important thing right now. Right now because its got to do with what is soon ahead- my future. Fasting hasnt been as easy as I thought it would be, but its alot easier than finding time to pray. Time to pray is soo conveniently blocked out by busyness and the life and attitudes that I have let grow and build and make me who I am.
Lord, change me as I seek this breakthrough.
"One thing I ask of the Lord, this is what I seek; that I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life; to gaze upon the beauty of the Lord and to seek him in his temple" Psalm 27.4
A redrawing of priorities. A change in attitude. A new beginning.
YAY :)
11:32 pm
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Monday, 2 July 2007
THIS IS LIZZY!
SHE LOVES MIFA!
AND SHE NEEDS A TEST ENTRY.
SCROLL
SCROLL
SCROLL.
11:03 pm
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